katerina's Blog

Cambodia. Beauty, hope and courage. Writing this after returning to the United States makes me truly appreciate the whole experience. Oddly enough, we left Cambodia on a hot, clear, beautiful day, and as I am writing this now snow is falling and has blanketed my house in white.
As a senior at Western Connecticut State University I was eager to give up my intercession break for a two and a half week stay in Cambodia. Jeannie Hatcherson first mentioned the trip to me over the summer, and I immediately made up my mind to go. I am no stranger to traveling, and although my family was hesitant about seeing me travel around the world, they were proud of me. I understand why people would be proud, but really I do not feel like I did anything spectacular. Anyone could buy a plane ticket and help out one of the hundreds of NGOs in Cambodia today. I was simply doing something I loved. It felt so right for me. I adore children and have a degree in Early Childhood Education. I have been working in day care centers for years and have taught fourth grade, Pre-K and Kindergarten classes. I jumped at the chance of working at the day care run by Hearts and Hands for Cambodia. In preparation for the trip, I ran a bake sale. Luckily the proceeds totaled $250- more than what I had hoped for. My cousin lent a helping hand and organized her high school's National Honor Society to hold a dance, with the fundraising money to go towards the purchase of supplies for the children. Thanks to our hard work, I arrived in Phnom Penh carrying a large duffle bag, overflowing with goodies for the children in Battambang. But there was much to do before we were able to get to the day care.
While in Phnom Penh we toured temples at Takeo, the Royal Palace and the National Museum. We visited Toul Sleng prison, while made my stomach ache. I knew Cambodia's history before I arrived, but stepping into those buildings made it real. It terrified me that a government was capable of committing such horrific crimes on its own countrymen and women. What scared me even more was that the entire world did nothing to stop it. No one prevented the genocide from continuing and no one tried ANY of the Khmer Rouge officials. It dampened my outlook on the goodness of humanity. Looking at those buildings made me cry, for the people of Cambodia and all they have endured. During our stay in Battambang we hiked up a mountain to see the killing cave, where people were killed and thrown to snakes. The reality of the genocide was all around me, and it made me feel sick. To think that happened only 25 years ago blows my mind. We think horrible things like that cannot happen- we say never again. But it happened in Cambodia, it has happened since Cambodia, and it is still happening today. The mine museum we visited in Siem Reap was also hard. Our tour guide was a young boy who had his leg blown off by a land mine, which also killed his brother and sister. Walking around looking at all the destructive weapons used for war reaffirmed my already strong belief that war must end. Knowing there are still 7 million land mines in the jungles and fields of Cambodia scare me. It was a very heavy and emotional time for me.
Another touching experience came for me in Phnom Penh. We visited SFODA orphanage and I fell in love with a newborn baby. He was only five days old and was sick with thrush. I held him and gave him a bottle and he fell asleep in my arms. When I asked what his name was, I was told he had no name. I was told I could name him if I wanted. I honestly did not know what to say. Naming a child is a big responsibility and I felt that I was not worthy of naming the baby. I had just met him, spent a half an hour with him- how could I be the best candidate for selecting his name? After we left SFODA I thought of the little boy. I wanted to name him. When we went back to the center, Chris bought formula powder for him. I held him longer this time, talking to him and dancing with him. I asked again if he was named yet, eager to accept the responsibility. They said no, and that I could choose a name. Siddhartha I said. They said they would call him Hartha for short. It was difficult to leave SFODA that day, as I knew saying good-bye to Siddhartha would be hard.
Chris Wagner who runs Hearts and Hands for Cambodia, introduced us to three Cambodian friends- Phala, Sreymom and Sotia. We became fast friends. Phala spoke English fluently and was able to coach me in Khmer while I helped him with his English. Phala is friends with a group of monks at a pagoda in Phnom Penh and we went to meet them. One spoke very good English and we talked for a while. He asked if I would like to see his house and I went with him to a little wooden house adjacent to the pagoda. He turned on a string of small, bare light bulbs that certainly did not brighten the dark, one roomed house. The beds were draped with the orange toned cloths Buddhist monks are known for. I smiled when I noticed a Coca Cola can atop the monk's shelf. There was a shrine to Buddha, adorned with yellow incense and golden trinkets. I took my shoes and hat off, knelt on the ground, folded my hands and bowed my head for Buddha. I knew what to do, as I observed in pagodas during the days before. I touched my forehead to the ground three consecutive times and folded my hands and bowed my head to Buddha a final time. When I stood up everyone was standing around me and the monk was laughing because I knew the proper way to pay respect to Buddha. That was a unique experience. Another wonderful way to end our trip in Phnom Penh was meeting Princess Marie. We visited her silk shop and she gave us a tour, explaining the good work she has been doing. Meeting a real princess was very cool.
We departed Phnom Penh by bus with Phala, Sreymom, Sotia and their brother Bontin in tow. On the long drive to Battambang, we stopped in Pursat to visit an organization called Sustainable Cambodia. Out of all the organizations we visited I was most impressed with this one. The thing that made their work stand out from all the rest was that they insisted they accomplished nothing without the people. I liked how they were letting the people make their own decisions. We traveled to one of their village sites, and of course the swarms of children were a distraction for me. But the way in which the people of the village took initiative and propelled the work to be done was amazing. They decided who they wanted to represent the village, they decided the projects to be done and they were the manpower in getting the projects off the ground. Sustainability is obviously their main goal. It allowed me to see humanitarian aid orchestrated with the needs of the people as a priority. It was by far the best philosophy I have ever heard. Sustainable Cambodia should be a pillar to all NGOs around the world focusing on humanitarian work.
Our week long stay in Battambang was by far the most memorable point of the trip. I will miss the food at the center- the black pepper sauce, morning glory, rice and pineapple! The children at the day care were hesitant to meet us in the beginning, but by the end of the first day I had three kids holding onto each arm. Driving up to meet the children every morning was wonderful. They were eagerly looking for us and smiling. I even gave the little girls a bath! That was one of my fondest memories. Everyday a little 5 year old boy named Kot would grab my hand and pull me around the playground, speaking very fast in Khmer, as if I understood. His fingers and toes were deformed at birth- he only had one full toe and 4 full fingers. With Phala and Sreymom's help I interviewed him for the sponsoring program. He lives with his grandmother, who has HIV. His parents are divorced and his father works in Thailand, although he says he never sees them. I loved spending the week with Kot and the other children. We played Khmer games and we taught them the Limbo, Hokey Pokey, Head, Shoulders, Knees and Toes, and Ring around the Rosey. We attempted to teach them songs in English, but the language skills were not yet there. The children successfully counted to 10 and sang Where is Thumbkin? in English. Darla lead teaching courses for the five child minders at the center. Since I have an Early Childhood degree, I assisted Darla with the instruction for the child minders. I made instruments from empty cans and bottles (recycling!!) and made a learning book for one of the child minders. It included the alphabet, numbers, shapes, colors and identifications in English. Darla used the Khmer educational posters they had and showed the teachers how to use these as learning tools. She gave them pointers on what to teach and how to teach it, and made up activity centers. Without Darla's help all of the teaching supplies would be locked up in cabinets.
We also brought a play for the child minders to teach the children- The Cambodian Cinderella. The child minders took this on as their special project and the final play was performed during our party. Another unveiling we planned for the party was presenting the community with a newly painted building. Unfortunately, the painting did not go as smoothly as we would have hoped for, but by the last day the building had a fresh coat of bright paint and was reorganized by Darla. A mural was started in one of the rooms, with animals and nature scenes on the walls. For our last day at the center we threw a party. The parents were invited, as well as members of the villages. We distributed new clothes and shoes to the children and their families. Me and the other students sang a hello song in Khmer. The children sang a few songs and put on the Cinderella play. I adored how they used Batman slippers in place of a glass slipper. The costumes and makeup on the children were adorable and for their first play, they did very well. We celebrated with cookies, oranges, bananas and soda. It was a wonderful way to end our week. It was sad saying good-bye to the child minders, as I spent a lot of time working with them during the week. We gave each of them gifts and bid them good-bye. Then it was time to say good-bye to Phala, Sreymom and Sotia. Sreymom presented us with paper flowers she made, in our favorite colors. Sreymom and I cried, while Phala kept saying how happy he was. I will miss them and think about them often. We quickly became close friends, and it was sad to have to wish them good-bye.
The following day we left Battambang by boat for Siem Reap. I was happy we traveled by boat instead of bus, although I did get too much sun sitting on top of the boat. Tonle Sap Lake felt like the ocean, and the scenery for the whole trip was amazing. Sopaul traveled with us, which made me happy to still have Cambodian company. I spoke to her a lot about her personal experience during the Khmer Rouge and how firmly she believes in education. She is a strong woman, and I look up to her determination and strength. Siem Reap was spent touring Angkor Wat and the surrounding temples. Tuk tuks were a major form of transportation. We rode elephants up a mountain to watch the sunrise. That same day we watched the sunset from Angkor Wat. I partially defeated my fear of heights when I climbed up and down the vertical, small stones steps to reach the top of Angkor Wat. Despite my anxiety it was worth it. My favorite temple was Ta Prohm. The towering trees growing off the temple were breathtaking! They were so monstrous and alive, and they way they wrapped their thick roots around the stones were unbelievable. One night we went to an Apsara dance show. The costumes, slow movements and rhythms of the dancers were beautiful! I hope the Apsara dance is still taught to children today. It is such a rich cultural experience that should be shared for generations.
Now that I am home, I wish I could go back. I believe that helping others makes me grow into a better person. It cleanses my soul. It makes me happy, grateful, compassionate, understanding and appreciative. It puts life in perspective and makes me realize what is truly important. It makes me realize how all humanity strives for the same things- happiness and health. It makes me want to change the world. New ideas burst into my head. I get sick with the thought that my children will have to grow up in a world filled with suffering, poverty and war. Every act of kindness helps, and I am set on spending the rest of my life doing all that I can to help others. It was a wonderful trip, and I am looking forward to returning to Cambodia as soon as possible.